Samson; letting go

originally emailed on 27 September 2012

Dear friends,

You're getting this email because you've either been a part of Samson's life at some point, or have had to put up with me babbling about him all the time.

This past July, I left town for a few weeks. Somehow, Samson in all his stupidity managed to escape from his tank while I wasn't looking, despite having not even shown any interest in trying, and certainly not seeming capable of doing so, for almost four years. The tank was still secured when I got home. My best explanation is that he learned to teleport.

I've been tearing the house to pieces on a regular basis since then, but it's an old Pittsburgh duplex with lots of holes in the walls and plenty of delicious vermin scampering about. There hasn't been a sign of him at all, and I've finally decided it's not really worth the heartache to keep searching the same spots over and over; some of you have seen my current place, and can imagine that a thorough shakedown doesn't take very long, and that fifty thorough shakedowns gets a little disheartening.

It's actually plausible that he's curled up under the floorboards where I'm sitting right now, happily digesting some of the mice that have been eyeing my trash can. The past few nights here have been pretty cold, but I'm sure there are warm pockets in the house. Or maybe he's hitchhiked to Kansas. In any event, I have no idea where he is, and I have no idea if I'll ever know where he is. I'm sure it's a pretty great, mind-blowing adventure for him!

Last weekend marked his approximate fourth birthday; next month will mark four years since I brought him home. I just packed up his tank and everything that goes with it; it's stashed in my basement on the off chance Murphy's Law comes through and I trip over him as soon as I fire off this email.

Thanks to you guys for helping me take care of him, teaching him about how humans are pretty okay things, checking in your boots and luggage in case he was trying to stow away, and dealing with me being kind of out of it for the past couple of months. If he turns up, you'll certainly hear my cries of joy, possibly before I even get to sending an email about it, but otherwise, I am considering him indefinitely MIA.

Imported on 10 October 2013 23:44